How To Tell An Older Woman You Want Her?

We should agree that it can be hard to tell someone that you are interested in them, and when it comes to older women, knowing how to express your feelings can be even more difficult, especially if you don’t know her much.

It may feel intimidating to approach an older woman and tell her you want something more than friendship. But with the right attitude, technique, and preparation, you can express your feelings easier.

In this article, we provide some tips on how to tell an older woman you want her. From understanding her boundaries to choosing the right words, there are many factors to consider while attempting this delicate task.

How To Approach An Older Woman?

Before saying something like this, first, we have to know that person better and be in her good books. So try creating a good impression and get to know her a little. You don’t want to end up in something you don’t want to.

If that woman is married, leave her alone. She has a husband and family, and any wrong action may affect all of them. Don’t pursue married women for your carnal desires; there are plenty of women out there who are single and don’t mind a casual hookup.

Now, let’s see some points of how to approach an older woman (if you don’t know her much).

How To Impress An Older Woman?

1) Initiate A Conversation:

The best way to start a conversation would be to ask her how she is doing today. Most people forget to ask this question; it can be a good icebreaker.

Approach in a very platonic manner. You wouldn’t get rejection straight away. Feel the situation first. Find out who she is. Is she a conservative type of person or liberated? Observe how she is responding to you, and by then, you will know what to do in the next step of the approach.

2) Talk To Her Like You Would Anyone Else:

First, it’s important to remember that age is just a number. Older women appreciate honesty, confidence, and respect just as much as anyone else. They feel more comfortable talking to someone on the same level instead of feeling like they have to put on a show or act differently around someone younger.

So don’t let the age gap intimidate you when expressing your interest in her.

3) Listen To Her:

If you want to be in the good books of an older woman, be patient and listen to her. By giving your time to listen to what she has to say, you can understand her better as she shares her story and life.

Also, you can learn a lot and gain a deeper understanding of things as she has a lot of life experience, and older women often have valuable insights to share.

Be patient with her and respect her pace; it will show that you value her as an individual.

4) Compliment Her:

You can compliment an older woman for her looks or accomplishments.

It is always nice to receive compliments, no matter who we are and how old we are. Also, older women often do not get as many compliments as they deserve. So, by complimenting an older woman genuinely, you will make her feel good about herself, which can boost her confidence and self-esteem.

It also shows that you respect and admire her, which can also make her feel valued and appreciated. Compliments also help in creating a positive aura and friendly interaction between you.

Note: Be sincere and honest in your compliments. Don’t say something you don’t mean just to impress her.

5) Create An Impression:

Just because you are younger, she will probably think you don’t really know what you want or are doing. So, you need to prove to her right away that you are not her for playing games and are a serious sexual option for her. Such self-confidence can be even more attractive when coming from a young guy.

flirting with a colleague

One of the best ways to emit confidence is through eye contact. It is the easiest and most effective way to show confidence and let her understand you know what you’re doing.

You can intensify the sexual tension by entertaining thoughts of the two of you getting physical while maintaining strong and steady eye contact. This can help you project a sexual vibe, and she may take you seriously.

6) Be Confident In Your Approach:

Most of the older women have lots of dating experience at their age, and they know what they want. Unlike teenage girls, they don’t bother to waste their time and energy playing guessing games with immature guys. This is probably women at their absolute finest because they have been there, done that, and learned from their mistakes.

So, we can say that they are properly aged and perfectly chilled. They are survivors, and their self-confidence & self-esteem are probably the highest they have ever been in their lives.

Also Read: Signs A Married Woman Wants To Sleep With You

If you are interested in an older woman, be direct. Express what you are looking for and what you want from her. Don’t beat around the bush. Also, try not to be too sloppy. Plainly blurting out that you want to bed her may not get you anywhere, either.

7) Make Her Curious About You:

The first step in building attraction is to get her interested in you by being fun and playful. There is some kind of vibrant energy that comes with youth, which many people lose slowly over the years.

So, no matter what your age, then, you are more likely connected with that “boyish charm” than the older guys who try her more and naturally have a higher energy level than the guys she’s used to.

Now, combine that refreshing, youthful energy with a strong sense of confidence and purpose.

8) Tease Her Playfully:

If you think she is a conservative type, do not reveal your feelings for her that you want her as more than a friend straight away. You should win her trust first.

Make her like your companionship. If you feel she is thrilled with you being around, then you can confess that you want a relationship. Say it as if you are teasing her, and watch her reaction. Even though mature women have open minds, they still want to be seduced and earned.

9) Fulfill Her Fantasy:

Getting attention from a younger guy is an empowering feeling that can make an older woman feel sexy. Even though it is not your intention, you are giving her ego a nice little boost and making her feel good.

Also, she might likely have fantasized about being with a younger guy at some point. So, part of her will be curious to see if you can be that guy who fulfills this sexual fantasy for her.

How To Tell An Older Woman You Want Her

If you just want a casual fling from an older man and want to get to things fast, even if it means facing rejection, then these are some of the most effective approaches to bag yourself a cougar.

These suit you when you don’t want to invest more time or when you want to take her with you for the night from a bar or party.

1) Buy Her A Drink:

If you see an older woman at a bar and are too shy to ask her out directly, you can buy her a drink. Some guys have a problem building up the courage to talk to older women, as it can be intimidating. In such a case, one of the simple ways to communicate your message without even starting a conversation is to buy her a drink.

When you do this, she will definitely understand your intentions and know you want her. Even so, don’t forget to walk up to her since you are the man. It may not be practical to expect her to walk up to you because it isn’t natural for a woman to do so.

how to approach an older woman

2) I Saw You And Couldn’t Help Myself…

When you start the conversation, you can use this line. It is a good way to tell an older woman she is beautiful. You can end the line with some adjective or any other compliment. It’s better when your compliment is specific to her traits and taste.

There is no woman who won’t like someone talk about how they couldn’t stop themselves from admiring her.

The appeal of this sentence makes an impression that you are straightforward about your desire while complimenting her.

3) I Would Like To Spend More Time With You:

In the middle of the conversation, you can also say something like: “I really like you, and I find you very attractive… and to be very honest with you, I would very much like to spend more time with you!

That’s it. Here, you are not saying anything sexual or overly aggressive. You are just expressing your interest without really sounding like you want to hump her in the sheets.

It is a classy way of being direct in your intentions and still being a gentleman.

4) I Hope You Find Me As Interesting As I Find You:

When you are hitting it off with an older woman, naturally, you will be excited and curious to know whether she feels the same way about you.

This can be a better option for guys who like to play it safe and don’t want to give it away completely. Although this line conveys the message that you fancy her, you won’t say anything to her face.

Mostly, it is used by men who don’t like to get rejected and, at the same time, still want to try their chance with a woman. The advantage of using this line is that suppose you don’t get your desired answer; you can easily twist it later.

5) I Would Love To See You Again:

If you are having fun chatting with that older man, you can consider using this line when you want to meet up again.

Being straight to the point and having no drama with a mature woman mostly has a positive effect. You can also try adding your manly charm and mischief with a bit of humor if you want to go straight for a hookup.

You can simply add “Maybe naked next time?” at the end of the statement to make your intentions clear.

But if you want a date instead, formally finish it with a time and location.

how to impress an older woman

6) Would You Like To Leave With Me Right Now?

If she seems interested in you and positively responds to the statements mentioned before, you can ask her to come along with you if you know she is free tonight.

When you want to score with older women, Remember that you have to be classy and mature.

Mature women are sick of the childish behavior of immature men. They won’t even consider you if they view you as one such. So, make sure they like whatever you say and show confidence.

All things considered if you whisper some assertive line manly, an experienced lady’s ear will more or less lead to a sexy outcome.

7) I Could Show You A Great Night If You Let Me

Unline young girls, most of the older women are seasoned experts and can easily separate their feelings from hookups.

Generally, women reach emotional maturity by their mid-thirties, so they are emotionally more stable than young girls. So, they can handle casual sex much better around this age.

For casual hookups, they prefer direct yet respectful invitations. Therefore, an offer like this will be more well-received than a discreet and vague one.

Also Read: Why Do Guys Cheat Early In A Relationship?

8) Would You Like To Spend Sometime With Me Tonight

With all their age and experience, mature women can immediately read a guy’s goal and motive by only talking to him for a few minutes. Hence, you need not beat around the bush if sex is on your mind. You can convey what you want soon after ensuring you capture her attention.

You have to set the mood and attract her first. When everything is going your way, you can ask her this line, and you will mostly get the desired outcome.

9) You Don’t Want Me To Leave You Tonight, Do You?

This line deals with the power of suggestion and a perfect psychological bait. We can get positive results by putting the possibility of an idea as it can effectively influence how a person reacts.

In another way, by suggesting this line to an older woman, you are not only letting her know that you want to sleep with her but also making her consider doing it, especially since you made her feel attractive.

As this is a playful and sexy approach, you can easily create the required sexual tension between the two of you.

9) I Enjoyed Reading Your Profile:

Older women’s attitude remains the same, even if it’s online dating. They want it directly without any unnecessary noise. They always appreciate a frank and open message, so you can use this option to your advantage while telling an older woman you want her.

Be specific. Continue the sentence by saying what you liked about her profile and what made you send a message to her. If you approach this way, you will seem genuine and relatable. It also sets you apart from other guys and makes her interested in you.

Summing Up:

Older women are also eager to be with younger men and accept your proposal if you do it the right way. Their liking is because they can be more comfortable with someone who is less experienced and less likely to judge them.

They are attracted to the energy and vibrancy of youth. Or it could be that they simply enjoy the company of someone at a different stage in life. Therefore, when expressing your interest, be direct but also respectful.

Avoid using cheeky pickup lines; they are not college girls. Instead, be a man and speak from the heart with sincerity. Remember that everyone wants to feel valued and desired, no matter their age or gender identity.

When you approach an older woman, try to engage her in a conversation that allows you both to share your interests and values. This can help build a foundation of trust and comfort before opening up about your feelings.

On the other hand, if you only desire a casual thing, you can try using pickup lines that don’t beat around the bush and convey the message directly.

If she doesn’t reciprocate your feelings, give respect for her boundaries and simply walk away, as there are a lot of other fish in the sea.


  • Dress well and keep yourself groomed.
  • You have to be confident and show that you are not afraid of a challenge.
  • Avoid appearing too eager or needy, as cougars (older women) are attracted to independence and maturity.
  • Be playful and engaging, but also don’t come on too strong.
  • Be respectful and considerate while conveying your feelings.
  • If you can make her laugh, you already won 50% of the game.

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